So we have a date. I thought it was a date. I think you told me you did not consider this a date recently but it really doesn’t matter. By now, for me… I am actually really excited for this. I’m excited and very nervous. Part of me feels like maybe you would cancel again. I was so nervous. For some reason I was so open to you so quickly. Maybe it was because I was so vulnerable the day of the ukulele festival and you felt so comforting that day that I just wanted more. Also by this time, I’m fully over my ex and really ready to have a relationship again. I guess I picked you and didn’t look back.

Bartaco. Your go to at that time. The place is great honestly. We have two different experiences on that date and you did not like me. I guess this made us even at this point by both rejecting each other at some point. I think you even text me a week or so after something like: “Though you think we would be wonderful together and have a fantastic relationship at this time you do not think you should be with someone and wish me all the best” Something to that effect. How about that, wow.

Now that I think back… I should have just left you alone. I think I did actually. We end up talking again though. I text you a funny gif of a firearm going off wrong and then we start talking again. I have no idea why.

It is November now. You invite me out for dinner. We go to the Station near me. Your energy is much different this time. You are engaging with me more and tell me your dreams. I’m still smitten. We kiss that night. Damn I really miss your kiss right now. That hurts to think about. Its likely I’ll never kiss you again.

I leave for Montana and I’m there for a little over a week. Surprisingly, we don’t talk that much. I’m there for Thanksgiving. I later learned you spent this holiday with The Ex.

It is the individuals responsibility to wait until they are done with one person to move on to the next. You don’t do this. You jump from one situation to the next without ever letting yourself heal and reflect from anything. I know you are trying to work on this. You say you really want to be single but the whole time we have been seeing each other. I think also you aren’t over The Ex and she is around too so I do not know. You compulsively hoard women keeping them close enough so they do not fully move on and neither do you.

Anyway, when I come back from Montana it feels like we really start to build momentum.